We asked Miranda, FGT Intern Extraordinaire, to give us her best fest etiquette tips and survival skills. No filter.
Stay classy, Festies.
1. Do not pretend to know a band you don’t know. Or you’ll end up looking like this.
2. If you are texting or looking at social media through the entire set of a band, expect to be looked down upon.
3. If you are having a loud, obnoxious conversation during a chill number by, let’s say Ben Howard, expect to have daggers shot at you from everyone’s eyes.
4. Don’t claim you love a band or are an avid follower if you can’t name the singer or one of their albums. You will be questioned and you will be mocked by die-hard fans.
5. Restrict the dad moves as much as possible. People will stare and look at you with a strange look in their eyes and it won’t be a look of admiration.
6. Be prepared for a massive stampede towards the front of the stage after a set, in preparation for the next band. Believe me, I saw my life flash before my eyes after Lana Del Rey and before Eminem at ACL. Hold on to your friend for your life and be prepared for a serious lack of oxygen and an immense amount of body heat.
7. If there is an artist you desperately want to see, get there 10 hours before to be in the front and bring rations and a diaper because you will not be leaving to eat, drink or go to the bathroom under any circumstances.
8. If you’re extremely tall, just prepare to be despised by all the people behind you. Yes, we all know that you can’t help your tall people genes, but there’s nothing worse than being behind you, destroying all of our chances at catching a glimpse of the singer’s face.
9. If you wear a flower crown to an indie fest, expect to see a mass of other girls wearing the exact same thing and for your hope of original style to be crushed.
10. When you pretend to know the words to a song and mouth random things, we will notice and we will laugh.
11. When you say that you are trying to reach a friend in the first ten rows and are shoving past everyone, believe me – it will not be appreciated.
12. Don’t expect to be able to Instagram or Snapchat every moment. There are millions of people and millions of phones in the middle of a park – WiFi is not magic, people. And if you lose someone, you may or may not find them again all day.
13. Be prepared for a scary sight when looking in the mirror after a festival. Over 12 hours of dancing, having drinks spilled on you and sweaty bodies pressed against you, you will not be in prime condition.
NEVERTHELESS, attending a music festival will be one of the best and most exciting weekends you’ll ever experience so find the closest festival near you and go, go go!
As much as we hate to admit it, Mom was probably right when she passively aggressively hinted that you weren’t wearing enough sunscreen all those times. Not all pink will fade to tan, and sometimes that headache is in fact from forgetting to drink enough water. As an ode to moms everywhere we’ve put together a list of do’s and don’ts to get you ready for any festival.
DO – Wear and (at least consider that you might) Reapply Sunscreen
**As much as you want to work on that tan, you should also consider that your nose, neck, and shoulders probably are not use to that much direct sun exposure and could burn quickly. Apply at least a minimal amount of sunscreen before your fest and consider bringing some with you. Then listen to your friends when they tell you that you look a little pink and could use a second application. Also be aware that many festivals have strict rules on what containers you can bring onto the grounds, and a lot of them do not allow aerosols, meaning you should check the website so you can be safe rather than sorry.
DO – Bring Allergy Meds/Kleenex
Even a very mild grass allergy can be really annoying at the end of a long day of festivaling. Being prepared allows you to enjoy time with your friends and favorite musicians without feeling like the Before of an over the counter allergy drug commercial. A travel pack of tissues is your secret weapon, and can also double as napkins post-food truck or as TP if (when) the porta-potties run out.
DO – Wear Good Socks
**Low cut sneakers and athleisure fashion are here to stay, which means thin and low cut socks. It is more than likely anything you are wearing will get dirty or damp at some point during the fest, and having socks that are not going to fall down when you need them is a must. If you are really feeling like a champ, pack a second pair.
DON’T – Forget to Get a Good Night’s Sleep and Real Food
**One of the easiest ways to ensure your festival experience will be a success is to make sure you sneak in at least a night or two of decent sleep over the course of the experience. It will help you wake up early to catch the smaller acts that are about to blow up and put you in a better mood whether you notice it or not. Festival weekends are also prime time for breakfast at midnight, and will help you make up for the nourishment you might be missing while you are running around during the day.
DON’T – Wear Brand New Shoes
**Buying and wearing new outfits for special occasions is great, but if you’ve never worn those lace-up sandals out before this might not be the place to debut them. Remember that any weird rubbing and poor support issues you deal with on day one will haunt you for the rest of the fest, and that is the last thing you want to be worried about. Not to mention most festivals are grassy, dusty, or even a little muddy by the end, and poor footwear will impede your race from stage to stage.
DON’T – Leave Home Without Any Cash
**Did your parents ever hand you a $20 on your way out the door because they didn’t trust you when you said you were all set for wherever you were going? Do yourself a favor and do that exact same thing for yourself. You never know what snacks, drinks, or tiny fans you will want to buy impulsively once you are at the festival, and having at least $20 cash ensures that you aren’t flat broke if something comes up.